We Developed and We Won... or Did We Lose?

Just a month ago, my driver had started attending ‘Spoken English’ classes. Today when he came home, my parents being friendly and concerned as ever asked him to converse with them in English. He has always been a confident guy, so he agreed. We had sent him to get some medicines. So, the medicines that he bought, the money he spent, the balance, the conversation, everything was in English. I was astounded, to say the least! True, his English was not fluent, but it was good enough! For learning time of one month, it was amazing! Our driver learning how to speak enough English to converse in it within a month symbolized development to me…

What I had taken 14 years to learn, he had learnt a huge part of it in just a month! I went into a dream after this… If I could finish my 12 years of schooling in just a year, how wonderful it would be! I was brought back to senses by my father, who reminded me that our driver was 20 years old.

But our world is developing very fast, we can’t deny this. 13 years ago, all the knowledge under the sun was not one click away, no one said “if you don’t know it, just ‘google’ it!” In 1946, a ‘computer’ occupied a whole room. “Mankind took thousands of years to progress from wheel to the car, yet only decades from car into the space” (from Angels and Demons, spoken by Camerlengo Carlo Ventresca”)

An Ad which I would like to put on my blog:

A Speech Which Silenced the World for 5 Minutes:

But what has this cost us? We didn’t know the consequences of this development. It cost us a new subject and a few more chapters- Environmental Education. Jokes apart, it has cost us a lot. I don’t have to tell you what will happen if we continue in the same manner. It is a well known fact. The fact that it is well known shows us how much damage is already done, and a rough idea of how much is left for us to do…

Many say that my generation is spoilt and very money minded. We won’t care about the environment and destroy it recklessly for money. We will even forget our relationship with our fellow human beings.

This is my answer to them:

Smoke and Dad

Diwali, (I know that I am just few months late) isn’t that just… awesome, good, great… sorry, my vocabulary isn’t that good, I don’t have so many positive adjectives, but yeah, I guess you get the picture of how excited I was…

But at the end of the day, it is what you learnt that matters… So, Diwali was not great just because I got to see my cousins after a long time, and not just because I got great Chutney with Idlis…

I learnt 2 things, let’s put it this way, I experienced two incidents I can’t forget. I don’t think I can summarize, it would be too long. Here we go, or rather, I go…

Deafening noises, blinding light, shouting, laughing (I’m serious; this was exactly how it was). This was Diwali as seen (and heard) by me from the terrace of an apartment in Hyderabad.

Ecstasy and Euphoria, to say the least… All around me, laughter was spreading like a disease. My resistance has always been weak, and I don’t regret it, at least here. We (My Family) were just laughing, and of course, bursting crackers.

I totally dig on crackers. My real, full, natural laughter had returned to me after what, I don’t know how many years, months… I wouldn’t know. It had just… returned, that much I knew.

Amongst all the obvious stuff like noise and light, I missed the obvious thing!!! The thing that made me cough, choke, made my eyes burn. Who cares? It was Diwali. Well, I did care, later though… So, I ignored this grayish thing, wriggling its way through the night sky, and my nose and eyes…

Three hours later, I was seated comfortably in a car, looking outside a closed window. I was back home in a few seconds.

I was back to my usual self (Which means I had calmed down a bit). As usual, my instinct took over me. I went to the balcony to look outside, my brain told me ‘don’t go, there’s smoke out there. My instinct told me ‘go, there’s something you have to see.’ And I saw the same grayish thing. I always knew it was smoke, always, but now, I realized it was smoke. Trust me, there’s a huge difference, knowing and realizing… It would have been boring for me 2 years ago, but now it was not.

All those Environmental Education classes, I just sat there reading those ‘Air Pollution’ chapters with no interest. They somehow made sense today.

I took part in creating all that smoke. How could I?

As far as I know, there are two causes of celebrating Diwali:

(i) Lord Rama killing Ravana

And

(ii) Lord Krishna killing Narakasura.

Both these causes emphasize on the Victory of Good over Evil, obviously a reason to celebrate…

Pollution is evil, I’m sure we agree here. And that’s what we are contributing to by bursting crackers on this day. Tell me, which God would be happy?

I don’t think banning is a good solution, but how about moderation? I mean, why not reduce the bursting of crackers? Rest is up to us. I will not say you, I will say ‘us’.

Next, I am coming to the morning part. Sorry I should have put this earlier, but I think it is better this way.

Morning, or should I say, Midnight Sun, was the time. I mean, it was very early in the morning, around 5 or 5:30 am. It really is early, at least on a holiday. Dad was right there, in front of me, trying to wake me up (that’s hard now…). I finally woke up. I asked him, “Dad, what did you buy for me? As in, a gift?” He replied, “I brought you new clothes right?” And I retorted, “That’s routine na Dad?” He sighed mockingly and said, “Then, I didn’t buy you anything Kanna.”

I made a face at him, finished the Puja and picked up my Civics textbook. I usually pick up that book only if I’m angry. It looked new, owing to the frequency of touching the book.

I started reading this lesson called ‘Democratic Rights’. Guess, for how much time did I read the lesson before I almost put it down? 10 seconds. Record. But that’s the point, I almost put it down. Then I saw a letter to… well, its better you read it.

Dear Mr. Tony Blair,

Firstly, how are you? I sent a letter two years ago. Why didn’t you reply?!? I was waiting for a long time but you did not reply. Please can you give me an answer to my question? Why is my dad in prison? Why is he far away in Guantanamo Bay? I miss my dad so much. I have not seen him for three years. I know my dad has not done anything, because he is a good man. I hear everybody speak about my dad in a good way. Your children spend Christmas with you, but me and my brothers and sisters have spent Eid alone without our dad for three years. What do you think about that?

I hope you will answer me this time.

Thank you,

From: Anas Jamil El-Banna,

9 years old

7/12/2005

Anas’ dad was suspected of having a role to play in the 9/11 attacks. (Please Google Guantanamo Bay).

I just looked up and saw Dad looking at me as though something was wrong, after all it wasn’t exam time and I had a textbook, a schoolbook which I was actually reading. I said, “It’s alright if you haven’t bought me anything, other than clothes of course.” I winked at him and added, “There are always other festivals…”

I silently thanked God for keeping Dad with me. His presence was, is and will remain a gift in itself…

To My Dearest Friend...

Scratches, bruises, kicking, punching... These were not included in my fight with one of my best friends during the tour. It was all verbal... War of Words. I felt so depressed all through the tour after that, and I still do. But, I have never tried tomake it up to her. Maybe she has, but I definitely have not done so.

On my birthday, I couldn't get this thought of my mind about these fights... And I felt so bad about them. So I was just about to decide the worst thing possible, I wanted to go tell her that I don't want to be friends with her anymore.

Thank God. Thank God it was my birthday... As usual, my sweet cousin had come to rescue. She didn't know that such things had happened, but yeah. Her poem did teach me a lesson. A lesson I hopefully will never forget in life: Care for the people who care for you, a lesson of friendship, a lesson how to respect others' affection towards you.

As my eyes gently open each morning,
There you stand everyday,
To greet me,
To help me,
To comfort me,
As I work through my tensed day.

You are the Sun,
In my blackened world.
You are the voice,
Of my laughter.
You are the colors,
Of my rainbow.
You are the white rose,
In my rose bush.
You are the ripples,
In my water.
You are the sapphire,
Of my stone.
You are the wind,
That blows through my hair.
You are the rain,
That washes down my face.
You are the melody,
Of my music.
You are the stories,
Of my life.
You are the heart,
Of my soul.

You are my best friend.

- Shilpa Vasuki.

Thanks Shilpa. Thank you so much... I love you my friends, and if I ever fight with you, I'm sorry and I don't mean to do so. I love you...

खुशबू रचते हैं हाथ

It was one of those rare days when I went out for a casual walk with my mother in the evening. We saw a small shop selling some irresistibly pretty flowers. It was Friday the next day, my grandma always insists on stringing flowers across the photos/potraits/idols of Gods/Godesses. I took this as an excuse to ask my mother to buy some flowers. My mother gave me the green signal after some amount of persuasion. She was fiddling with her purse to find some change to give that little girl selling the flowers. She asked me to give the girl that money and added, " Don't touch that girl while giving her the money. God knows when she takes bath." Perhaps it was the fact that she didn't know English that she didn't feel bad... Or was it the darkness around me that I couldn't see her pain... Or was it the mist inside me that hid her sadness from me...??? You may understand what I mean by saying mist- pity, anger, embarrasment... everything was woven into a solid confusion... thick mist...

This has happened many times to me, but this one was special. The next day, we had one poem in our Hindi lesson- खुशबू रचते हैं हाथ। I am going to put it in here. Sorry if you can't read Hindi, I shall put down the meaning I derived from it...


कई गलियों के बीच
कई नालों के पार
कूड़े-करकट
के ढ़ेरों के बाद
बदबू से फटते जाते इस
टोले के अन्दर
खुशबू रचते हैं हाथ
खुशबू रचते हैं हाथ ।

उभरी नसोंवाले हाथ
घिसे नाखूनोंवाले हाथ
पीपल के पत्ते से नए नए हाथ
जूही की डालसे खुशबूदार हाथ

गंदे किटे-पिटे हाथ
ज़ख्म से फटे हुए हाथ
खुशबू रचते हैं हाथ
खुशबू रचते हैं हाथ ।

यहीं इस गली में बनती हैं
मुल्क की मशहूर अगरबत्तियाँ
इन्ही गंदे मुहल्लों के गंदे लोग
बनाते हैं केवड़ा गुलाब खस और रातरानी अगरबत्तियाँ
दुनिया की साड़ी गन्दगी के बीच दुनिया की सारी खुशबू
रचते हैं हाथ

खुशबू रचते हैं हाथ
खुशबू रचते हैं हाथ।

-- Shri Arun Kamal.

It tells us about the inequality our Indian society (Right to equality, huh?) . We use agarbattis, I think they are called incense sticks... We use agarbattis which spread a good aroma around our house. But the ones who give us this aroma around us, this comfort... They live in utter poverty. They make aroma for us and have pungent odour surrounding them... They give us our daily comforts but are deprived of the basic necessities of life- 2 square meals, a decent house to live in and proper wearable clothes...

I am happy that people like Shri Arun Kamal are around there somewhere... who write about these disturbing everyday things. They make us aware. They shout- "Yes, this is true. It's happening. Look around you." I don't know how many people out there have read poems of the likes of this. I thank you for writing this poem... For telling me about those poor hands which make my Pooja room smell good...

Thank you!

Our Sense of Honour...

Why only a handful of freedom fighters are known? This is one of my questions yet to be answered. If only a handful are remembered, then why only some among them are really admired? Among Subhas Bose, Jawaharlal Nehru and Gandhi, why only Gandhi and Nehru are a most admired lot.

We must not forget Netaji; he was one of the most selfless freedom fighters we ever had।

Why is the 23^rd of January not a national holiday, why 2^nd of October and 14^th of November are remembered? We must honour those who were willing to lay down their lives irrespective of whether the person succeeded in his/her pursuits। A person like Bose could have happily worked as a Civil Servant; he would have received a handsome salary, luxurious house to stay in and all the privileges that an Indian employee in British India could only dream of.

He was willing to lay down his life for a noble cause.

Subhas Chandra Bose remains merely a name in the list of freedom fighters, all Indians must make a sincere effort to honour him. Subhas Chandra Bose must not merely remain a name; people must begin to value his efforts.

Nobody at his time would’ve dared to attempt such a thing as organizing an army during the world war. He had amazing guts, conviction and an iron will, he had a voice which none could suppress. He is indeed a “forgotten hero”. People like him are one in a million... billion... , a rare combination of intellect, courage, wit and patriotism. One person who stood as tall as his mind. There still are people like him in this world, every human must be valued for his efforts (if they are directed for a noble cause), art of every form must be encouraged and rest assured “luck” will find a tough time, seeking its place in this world.

I would only say that Bose and a handful of people like him were not lucky.

Some people are were and will remain alone…

तनहा राही अपनी राह चलता जाएगा

अब तो जो भी होगा देखा जाएगा ...

P.S.- I do not mean to offend Mahatma Gandhi or Mr. Nehru. I don’t even say that they must not be honoured. I just say that Netaji must be honoured too!

Dejection Point

Often in my English class, we have the usual teenage problem discussions where puppy love/crushes are discussed a lot. We all feel very embarrassed if anything of this sort is discussed. But, we are curious too, at least I am. So, I wanted to listen or read a first person account of this “crush” thing. The first person I thought of was my brother. He is 17, so probably he would have had such an ‘experience’. In my view he is the most intelligent person I have ever met. But I know him to be very shy too. So how could I ask him?

My cousin, Venky, told me that a lot could be told about a person through his folder on the hard disk or his desktop. Now, my brother doesn’t own a laptop, so I had to go for the second option: his folder. Some may think I was poking and prying, but Curiosity is not a sin. Then I saw this word document titled “Dejection Point”. The name is so cute that I couldn’t resist opening it.

I read it. I felt that it was from the heart. So much that I would have felt guilty if I wouldn’t put it on this blog. So here goes:
In the sands of time, I have lost
My new found love….
I cultivated dreams, big ones
Did I not appeal her?

The creator bestowed his majestic presence
Planning two lives for us
I was wrong,
And I hit the wrong gong
Lives are pre planned, love is destiny
Not choice

My beloved I don’t even know
Whether I am seriously in love
I know not the difference
Between love and infatuation
But I know that I am frustrated

There are times when I felt
I didn’t pay heed.
Maybe
I wasn’t the right person

At times I curse the one
You love
At times I curse myself
But times have changed
I wish you all the best

You may not believe that
I am happy for you
As an average man
I felt dejected
Now I’m a little happy
Because little do I know
Whether my love is truly love

God decides what each person
Is meant for. Both of us have a
Different purpose each.
It is at that time when
I sober down that I will be happy
For both our lives.
I only hope that the creator bestows upon goodwill and mercy.
He has been merciful to me, at least till date.
I hope I forget you sooner than ever.
I hope I feel happy for both of us.
If only I happen to see you, I see a good friend and nothing else in you.
I will carry you in my heart
Oh! My long lost love

This ballad I dedicate to you
All my life I promise to carry you
In my heart at least
Ill try be happy for both our lives.

In your praise-----------

You remind me of an angel
I gaze at you; you take me for a stalker
My gaze is such.
I like you at times
When you hate me
I like you at times when you smile at me.

You are as bright as a finely polished diamond
To think of you I need no almond
You are magic personified, possess a strange charm.

I seek mental solace in you.
It is at times difficult to put my mind in place

I made several attempts to forget you
You never seem to stop haunting my thoughts
I wish you all the best that the world has

When you smile you take my heart for a
Roller coaster ride. When you give a dirty look
I feel that something is gravely wrong in me.

In the sands of time, I have lost
My new found love….
I cultivated dreams, big ones
Did I not appeal her?

---Nonds




There might be some ‘poem readers’ out there reading my blog. I request you; please don’t look for poetic devices. The sincerity and dedication with which the poem is written… wow!

I don’t need to ask my brother for anything after this poem. My thirst has been quenched. I am satisfied. And this poem… it is simply… AMAZING. Awesome!

Three cheers for Nonds- Hip Hurrah! Hip Hip Hurrah! Hip Hip Hurrah!

Black, White and Grey

My heart was overflowing with joy. We (tourists) were in a Backwater Cruise at Allepey, Kerela in a Lake. My friends were joyous, laughing and chatting merrily. The atmosphere around me was that of Ecstasy and as far as I remember, this is the kind of atmosphere that gets my grey cells working… That is something good, since they had hardly worked at all from the very outset of the tour to Kerela. I was a little away from them, looking out of a small window. For the first half an hour I was very happy with the natural beauty around me. I was pleasantly surprised to see such beauty in Kerala. The noises and dust of Hyderabad never let me see or hear through them, or was I ignorant? Either way, I never expected to see SO much beauty around me. I think it was because I looked at the lake and its vicinity as one. I didn’t concentrate only on the lake…

It was then that I looked at a plastic bottle floating in water. Then slowly I started concentrating on the lake itself, and not its surroundings. Everything fell into place. Then I could see that a man was mercilessly throwing waste in the water. As it always happens to me when I start going back in time (not literally) or I start thinking, everything was now a void of darkness. Nothing else mattered at that moment. The words I had read in a book hit the right spot…

“The wheels have been in motion for a long time. Science has won the war. But, Science has left us in a world without wonder. We are bombarded with violence, division, fracture and betrayal. Man took thousands of years to progress from wheel to car. Yet only decades from the car into space. Now we measure Scientific progress in weeks. We are spinning out of control. The promises of Science have not been kept. Promises of efficiency and simplicity have bred nothing but pollution and chaos. We are a fractured and frantic species… moving down a path of destruction.”

I was wondering till now whether all this was true… Till now I held a very high regard for Science. I had placed it somewhere near God. Yet now, I questioned my unblemished faith in Science and development.

I somehow felt that such atrocity, like throwing plastic bottles in a lake must reach the people. So, I took a photo of the floating bottle. I questioned myself all over again: Science and its progress led to the invention of plastic and its disposal in such a manner. Yet it is Science which allows me write this… to spread the word… I was left with an awkward question. It was like deciding whether I should be friends with a person who has lied to me once and yet, has saved my life recently. I had to decide- Must I still trust Science? Science is not the cause for this, nor can we ever blame it. But who is the cause is hardly the question here.

Again I remembered something I had read- The world is not divided into black and white. It is in shades of grey. Now I began to see the third path- The mist that hid it from me had cleared. The path was one of moderation. Neither love not hate, neither like nor dislike, neither trust nor mistrust, it was one of unbiased judgement...